The Beauty of Conviction
It’s astonishing how the Spirit of God can pluck one small phrase out of a pile of words and individually gift wrap it specifically for you — precisely when and where you are at the exact moment you exist in the course of human history!
I’ve been reading five pages a day-ish in my journaling Bible in an attempt to read through it in a year. It’s shocking how quickly an insignificant undertaking like five pages can elevate in my mind to an impressive feat. And the moment my perspective shifts in that direction the opportunity to abide deeply with the Eternal Lover of my soul devolves into an arbitrary box to check.
It’s been incredibly helpful to put into practice the method for preparing to abide in the True Vine from The Well Worn Narrow Path: Breathe… Center… Invite… Ask… This simple practice has continued to daily reorient my mind and facilitate actually being present to Jesus through his Word.
Today, as I was combing through the heart breaking stories of the descent of God’s people in 2 Kings the Spirit highlighted a phrase, “so they feared the LORD but also served their own gods” (17:33). At first, I wasn’t quite sure what to do with it, so I underlined it and continued reading. It just so happens that I was also in Exercise 24 from the Devotion chapter in TWWNP. As I was meditating with God’s Spirit and journaling, that phrase from 2 Kings began to pierce deeply dividing soul and spirit, joint and marrow, exposing the reality of my heart.
God took a sentence describing the nations that inhabited the land of Israel after Assyria took his people into exile 2,700 years ago and lovingly indicted me. I felt like David when Nathan used a parable to bring conviction. In an instant it was clear — I was that man! Yes, I fear the LORD. I love Jesus. I seek after him. I’ve put into place practices and habits that facilitate abiding in him. But, I also serve other gods. I also tithe at the temple retail therapy. I also sacrifice my time at the altar of entertainment. I also give my heart over to the worship of fleshly appetites.
My devotion is divided.
Conviction is a beautiful thing… when and only when we have an accurate understanding of the full picture. Adopted children of God have Jesus as our advocate. We can approach God with confidence knowing he sits on a throne of grace rather than a bench of judgment wielding a gavel condemnation. In moving toward Jesus with confession and repentance we will find help in our time of need because he is already interceding on our behalf.
With those truths ringing throughout my soul re-securing my attachment to my Heavenly Father I was able to feel the pain of conviction and not hide in fear or cower in shame. As I looked into the loving, tear-stained eyes or my Savior I was able to allow the Spirit to do his work. Which is what I actually desire. I want to be a person who is fully devoted to Jesus. But, I don’t know I need to recalibrate without God showing me how far off course I am. I can’t move in that direction without his Spirit stirring up the motivation within me.
I’m incredibly grateful for the countless ways God gentle helps steer me toward himself. I’m so thankful that, in the words of Hillsong UNITED, he loves me as he finds me, but his love is too good to leave me here. Or as Paul says in Philippians, he will finish the work he started in me so long ago.
If I could give any encouragement today it would be to simply let God love you. Allow God’s Spirit to shower you with the pre-delight of the Father. Ask him to remind you of the depth of his love for you in action through Jesus. Because as the beauty and safety of that relationship develops you will be able to receive God’s gentle corrective measures that only lead to more of the abundant life Jesus lived, died, rose, and ascended for us to experience.